you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
