So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Randomize
