508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
BRING THE BAGELS
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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