Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
