Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
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