if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
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