No awkward lesbian experiences without me
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize