"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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