That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
ugly people sure do ruin things
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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