Cold hands, warm shart.
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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