Your mouth is God's brothel.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
