Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
