Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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