I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I wish I only lived at night.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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