Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
