i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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