he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
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