my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
What drink are we having for lunch?
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
