I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
3 2 1 whiskey
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
