I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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