I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize