is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize
