Don't you send me to vm
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
