She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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