her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
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