There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
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