I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize