I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
