That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize
