she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Randomize