ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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