Don't you send me to vm
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
