What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Randomize
