I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
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