So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Randomize
