Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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