i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Still dying that you shit outside
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
