Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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