I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
