I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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