I just made out with a guy for $7.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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