If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
