Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
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