At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
