Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
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