OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
