You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
