just survived the first fart of the relationship.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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