you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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