They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
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